Your ViewsKeep your e-mails pouring in, it's good to know that there are lots of you out there with views and opinions. To help you work out what is what, are now little icons to help you see biscuit related themes. And now you can see at a glance which are the most contested subjects via this graph (requires Flash 6.0 plugin). Please keep your mails coming in to nicey@nicecupofteaandasitdown.com | If you like, you can use this search thingy to find stuff that matches with any of the icons you pick, or use the fantastic free text search, Yay! | Your e-Mails |
Richard Westlake
Abbey Crunch Review |
Good day fine nicecupoftea.. folks.
I have been living in Sweden for the last 3 years and have had distinct hankerings for something.. something which I couldn't place... A yearning... It was not until another English friend asked me last year if I wanted anything while he was back in England (besides decent tea bags and cheese with any sort of flavour at all which go without saying), that I realised what that long surpressed longing was... The desire to eat, of course, Abbey Crunch! When he reported to me that they were no longer to be found I was devastated. I sat just shaking my head.. Surely these were almost everybody's favourite biscuit... It was a terrible day...
I personally, in my lifetime, have got through enough packets of the little oaty wonders to make Tescos and McVities a tidy wee sum. And I am only one of 60 million biscuit munching brits.
Bring 'em back. Get 'em in and put the f**kin' kettle on fer heven's sake.
With respect
Richard Westlake |
Nicey replies: Yes a grim old business the end of the Abbey Crunch. I paraded my last pack which sits on the NCOTAASD desk on TV last week, when I went down to do a special program about biscuits on UK TV Food. The pack was 3 years and 2 days past its best before date. Renowned chef Mary Berry tried to console me by making a batch of Oaty biscuits for that were quite like Abbey Crunch, it was all very poignant. |
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Darryl Snow
Abbey Crunch Review |
3 years ago, as we were forced to bid a tearful farewell to the Abbey Crunch, I was lucky enough to strike upon a Spar which had about 20 packets still in stock and racing towards their "best before date". Of course I bought them all; it was after all going to be my last chance to munch on my favourite snack of all snacks. I wolfed 16 packs within a matter of weeks (struggling to prolong them as long as I could and put in an admirable effort, if I do say so myself). The remaining 4 packets, however, overcame me with the temptation to try and preserve them... to hoard them forever with a Gollum-like obsession so that I may once again experience the perfect biscuit. That way, as I lay on my death bed, it may be the last thing that I may taste. This was all very good in theory - I kept the original foil wrappers intact, wrapped them in cling film, then generously in bubble wrap and again in foil. There they have lain, cushioned on a bed of cardboard away from any hint of light, warmth, or moisture.
It wasn't until this New Year passed that curiosity got the better of me and I decided to celebrate with friends who I care enough about to honour in such a way... we opened one packet of Abbey Crunch (best before March 2004). You can't imagine the pain... They were distinctly... stale tasting... not even in a tolerable way. If there was any trace of that original glorious flavour there then it had now been overcome... trampled to death... by this awful aftertaste and sandy texture. I don't understand what could have happened given my quasi-cryogenic preserving method.
So what now? I would really value your opinion on this. Do I pop another packet in hope that they will be OK, only to risk shattering the dream completely and amplifying my anguish if they're not? Do I donate them to someone braver or with a less acute sense of taste than I? Or.. do I... give up completely and... well... don't make me type it.
Yours,
Darryl Snow
P.S. forgot to mention that I'm moving to Beijing on Tuesday so it really is crunch time on this issue, so to speak.
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Nicey replies: Daz,
Its simple, both they and you have gone off by now. |
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Jeremy Thomas
Abbey Crunch Review |
Dear Nicey
I must agree with your comments regarding Abbey Crunch. A number of years ago, my colleagues and I conducted an in depth survey on the 'dip-ability' of a broad range of buscuits. On a daily basis we would subject a different type of bisciut to a range of dips in tea (and coffee too - we were young fools!). On the instructions of the Sales Director, the white board in the sales office was deployed to display the results, and a giant grid was filled to record every aspect of each biscuit's performance. The ultimate winner of course was Abbey Crunch although there were a number of noteworthy contestants too. I must say that the bewildering array of bisciuts available nowadays would need two whiteboards to hold all of the test results. Unfortunately our work was in vain, as I put on 12 pounds in weight and the Company went out of business.
Some years previous to this, I entered in to some correspondence with United Biscuits (I think it was they). I wrote to them complaining and asking why the end two Custard Creams in a pack are ALWAYS broken, and suggested simply removing them. They would naturally be replaced by a piece of foam or similar shock-absorbing material - I suggested that they should contact NASA, as they were very good a developing new composite materials and may have already undertaken a project like this for biscuits on the space shuttle. Let's face it, reaching escape velocity from the Earth's gravitational pull would potentially shatter any biscuit and could even give a tinned cake a good shake.
I was delighted to receive a courteous reply from a gentleman called Nigel Lewis in the Customer Services Office. Although courteous, his reply failed to impress, and it seemed obvious that they planned to do little to resolve this particular issue. He also claimed that 'in-house technical expertise' would be used for packaging developments and it was 'most unlikely that they would seek NASA's assistance'. In the 20 years since, I have wasted countless Custard Creams and made a great deal of mess due to the broken end biscuits in Custard Cream packs. Are you aware of any other biscuit which suffers quite so badly from damage in transit? If the Company which I used to work for were still in business we could have done a survey.
My biscuit of the moment is Chocolate Malted Milk - yum!
Regards
Jeremy Thomas
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Nicey replies: The chap at McVities was probably thinking about the outcome of the digital speckle pattern interferometry program at Loughborough University. This high tech technique adapted from the aerospace industry studies of fighter wings, showed that stresses and strains caused by residual baking moisture can lead to spontaneous fracturing of the biscuits in the pack. The end two just break due to the unsupported over hang of the biscuit over the cream and wear and tear, I expect. |
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Val Burns
Abbey Crunch Review |
I'm old enough to remember the original Abbey biscuits in the 60's, before they added the 'Crunch' to the name.
The advert shown on TV showed a close up on a lady taking a bite from the biscuit, delicately brushing away a crumb from the side of her mouth with her finger, either her little finger or 'ring' finger . The resulting pleasure from that bite was a smile on her lips echoed by the 'smile' on the biscuit - my mother,sister and I always looked [and found] the smile on Abbey biscuits and imitated the lady by wiping away the crumbs.
Love this site, proves I'm not the only tea/mug/pot/kettle obsessive!!
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Darryl Snow
Abbey Crunch Review |
During the dark ages (the few months, around this time last year, following McVities' misguided discontinuation of the abbey crunch), as the remaining abbey crunch stocks rapidly depleted accross the country, I scurried all over Manchester to purchase as many remaining packets as possible. Well it's been a thoroughly enjoyable albeit emotional year as I have been eating my little treasures. I now have 4 packets left and I am faced with the dilemma of how to store them in order to maximise their lifespan. I have so far kept them cellophane-wrapped, foil-wrapped, and bubblewrap-wrapped and in a cool, dark, dry place, protected by a tripple-bolt combination lock (so no one get any ideas!). My plan is to eat the remaining packets as my last meal, before I'm about to die... assuming you still get the munchies while you're dying. The thing is... I don't plan on dying anytime soon... so I need to keep my precious fresh for as long as possible. Someone told me the other day that my precautions may not be adequate. What would you suggest. Please help. Love the site, by the way.
Daz. |
Nicey replies: Daz,
I don't know, I'm down to my last packet. I had to open one in the summer for photography for the book and they were well past it, and only three months out of date. May cryogenics is the answer, for you not the biscuits. They could thaw you out if McVities resurrect the Abbey crunch and medical science work out a cure for for whatever took you out. |
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