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Last Friday we had a staff meeting and someone bought a box of Millie's cookies to keep us from eating our own legs during the afternoon. I thought I'd try a toffee one. The toffee had leaked out and set around the edges of the cookie and as a result was very hard and very sharp. Slashing your hand open with a cookie during planning for next year's service agreement does not, I'm afraid, add much to your professional reputation. Be warned!
|Nicey replies: Most Millies cookies I've been forced to sample have the texture of a dishcloth, which makes this is even more of a concealed hazard. Still it kept you from having to eat your legs I hope.
Nicey (Still traumatised and slighty queazy from an unprovoked spate of giant foot wide heavily iced Millies birthday cookies ten years or more ago)
Wonder whether you spotted the following report
Keep up the great work!
|Nicey replies: Oh yes that was all duly noted. We often drive past and take the train through Bishops Stortford so obviously it comes as a great relief to us to know that council staff have been trained up in tea making safety. The foreboding that a scalding hot cup of tea might come sailing out of an open council office window has now significantly reduced.|
Iced Gems Review
|Hi nicey & wifey|
We been greatly interested in the "die hard with a biscuit" scenario, and it has been much discussed. We suspect that whilst being useless as a weapon, garibaldi slabs would make good substitutes for Kevlar, when used in body armour vests... However, on the offensive, we favour firstly scattering a few packs of iced gems on the floor... Mr Willis invariably fights barefooted, we believe, and the tiny spikes pressing into his feet would undoubtably slow him up. We favour the McVities ginger nut for the coup de
gras as it is just the hardest on the block.
Meanwhile my colleague is just about to bring down a nice cuppa, and I am hoping that I don't get the black mug. (Stay away from the dark side, my son)
Keep up the good work
||Dear Nicey (and Wifey),|
I too am becoming alarmed by the increasing references to biscuit-related violence, when should be having a ANCOTAASD. I suspect the site may have been infiltrated by c*ff** drinkers, who are well-known for their more passionate temperaments.
Is there need for a campaign for universal "dunking", thus disarming these wild and dangerous extremists?
Keep up the good work,
|Nicey replies: Well apart from the actual face slashing with a broken Rich Tea incident these are all purely speculative discussions. Thus far Bruce Willis has remained unharmed by any form of baked snack item.
I'm glad you have called for a universal campaign for dunking rather than just an earthbound one, thus dealing with any hostile aliens on their way to us armed with particularly pointy and hard biscuits.
Fruit Shortcake Review
Further to this discussion as we have previously established, a few crumbs (especially from a ginger nut) can prove extremely dangerous, a few carefully laid crumbs could serve a purpose for those that wish to cause harm with biscuits…
However, I find it strange that suddenly you have e mails flooding in from people that seem keen on relaying tales of biscuit related violence. I think they need a nice cup of tea and a sit down. It must be all the horrific news and war in our world that is even creeping into our daily tea and biscuit related enjoyment…What is the world coming to ?
Oh and on another note, we had a discussion some time back when I asked you what you thought the most under rated biscuit was, you said a fruit shortcake. And although sceptical I cracked on with a packet just last week and I am certainly coming round to your point of view, they indeed do give way more than you ask of them.
At this rate I will be trying Garibaldis again and they haven’t seen the light of day in my world for a good 30 years after a fly related comment corrupted my then young mind and created a phobia for them. You make a strong case for them in your review I am tempted, maybe its my age?
Here's to revisiting biscuits from the past, and of course peace in our time.
|Nicey replies: The lack of a biscuits as weapons icon is becoming increasingly embarrassing.
A word of caution on the Garibaldis, modern ones are a bit drier and generally less chewy than those of antiquity. Just so that you are prepared, still certainly worth a good go. Also it is almost certainly your age, it is increasingly the reason for most standpoints I have on things. Wifey and I were very lucky to attend the Oldie magazine's 200th Edition party last week, were we told off by Patricia Routledge for not being old at all, however after a mere 5 or 6 drinks it took us both 2 days to recover fully.