Your ViewsKeep your e-mails pouring in, it's good to know that there are lots of you out there with views and opinions. To help you work out what is what, are now little icons to help you see biscuit related themes. And now you can see at a glance which are the most contested subjects via this graph (requires Flash 6.0 plugin). Please keep your mails coming in to nicey@nicecupofteaandasitdown.com | If you like, you can use this search thingy to find stuff that matches with any of the icons you pick, or use the fantastic free text search, Yay! | Your e-Mails |
CAH |
Hold the phone, there, Biscuit Boy! I'm always in shock when I see a package of Fig Newtons in a grocery store. Why? Because I'm quite sure that they've been sitting on shelves everywhere since the early 1960's. The same Newtons get dusted by store cleaners every week. I've never seen a Nabisco truck unload a supply of Fig Newtons in a grocery loading dock...ever. Please be advised that even if the crust on the Newton was modified for The Yank's favorite pursuit, mass consumption, we don't like them nor do we eat them - ruling out your theory that we eat them in bulk.
While we Yanks love nothing more than to ingest large quantities of empty calories, we do draw the line with stuff that tastes absolutely horrid. (Pork rinds an exception, of course.) Only painted old ladies in nursing homes and the poor hapless kids who visit them would dare to eat a Fig Newton! Why, it got *so* bad for Nabisco, they tried to lure us with a Strawberry Newton or some nonsense. We didn't buy it. Literally and figuratively. If we're going to eat biscuits, we demand our high fat, higher fat, double chocolate chunk with every rainforest nut AND lard inside cookie. Like, Mrs. Fields Chocolate Chips. Hot out of the (mall) oven and guaranteed to attach to your intestines after chewed to a glue-like nugget! Now, that's (a biscuit to you,) a damn fine cookie to us. |
Nicey replies: Thanks for that well meaning attempt to put me off the scent but we both know that the States is a big place so some of your fellow Americans must be scoffing Newtons, or else Nabisco would have canned them. Perhaps if you got hold of some proper Fig Rolls, you would come to terms with your Fig Newtons and even the Strawberry ones, which I have tried once. |
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