Your Views

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Your e-Mails

Revd. Stephen Day Fox's Whipped Creams Review	Hi Nicey, You asked about the spiritual aspects of Fox's Whipped Creams: I suspect most vicars could distinguish between a danger to their immortal soul and a tasty biscuit, but when I tried to pit myself against this potential force of evil, my local Tesco didn't have any. From the review, though, they look as if they could combine the two biggest practical dangers to the biscuit eating vicar: a crumbly texture and stuff that squidges out. It's very embarrassing to leave crumbs and blobs over the parishioners' immaculate sitting rooms. The ideal visiting biscuit is something small and relatively crumb free with a firm filling - Bourbons are about spot on. And visitees should try not to wait till the vicar has a mouthful of biscuit before asking "what do you think of women bishops, then?", unless they do it for the entertainment value. Regards, Revd. Stephen Day
Ian Fox's Whipped Creams Review	Hi Nicey, Just wanted to congratulate you on the mighty excellence of you site paying appropriate homage to the fine art of biscuit consumption. I'm glad someone's standing up for factual accuracy in relation to the Custard Cream being the nation's favourite biscuit - this is going to be one of those myths that gets repeated so often that it gains the status of a fact. On the subject of accuracy, you make reference to the Panda ads in your most recent review. I don't think Fox's mention it on their website, but if you check the original press releases the creature in question is actually a Danda (ie dog/panda hybrid). Yeah, it looks like a panda to me too! My guess is that everyone will assume likewise and Fox's will let it rest on Panda, given the current fashion for those creatures. Personally I can't see Vinnie [not Vinny, btw] doing any kung fu - he's no doubt got some boys to do that sort of thing for him... The other irony in all this is the agency that produced the series of ads (they're called Mother London) are based in a building called The Biscuit Building in trendy/arty Shoreditch. Anyway, feel free to use any of this as material on your site - I wonder what Fox's official line is now on the Panda/Danda question? Cheers, -Ian-
	Nicey replies: So now we have Italian American gangster Danda formed from the against nature union of a Dog and Panda (I'm guessing a chimera is the only possible way this could happen especially given Panda's breeding record with their own species )... who appreciates biscuits. I did think his mouth looked all wrong but now its probably very life like.
Joan McSwiggan	Hello Nicey, I have just discovered your website.I can't believe it ! I am the world's biggest fan of tea,cakes and biscuits. My partener recently had his 50th. birthday.We decided to have a garden party. We had an urn, supplying endless hot water for mugs of tea. On top of that we had mountains of scones, clotted cream and home made jam, as well as platters of cupcakes. Everyone was blissfully happy. (P.S. Yorkshire tea rules.) Joan.
	Nicey replies: Joan, Thank you for that lovely picture of the cup cakes. It sounds like a charming event. And talking of small cakes and tea urns. Wifey and I manned the tea and cake stall at the school fair last Friday and that little lot would have traded at 20p each which at rough first count comes to £22.80. Unfortunately due to some bad planning and people neglecting to write SOLD on some of the cakes we did manage to sell a few twice, although both Wifey and I were prepared to fight our corner if Sir Alan dragged us into the board room.
Penny T	Dear Nicey, I was forced to stop drinking tea for a few months and switch to instant coffee, not through choice, but because of a drop in tea quality. I am able to drink any kind of vile coffee but I am very particular about my tea. It has to be strong, with a dash of milk, no sugar. Builder's brew if you like. I have noticed that bog standard teabags such as Tetley, PG tips and Red Label have got weaker, so weak that I have not been able to brew a satisfactory cuppa. I suspect they are mixing the tea in the bags with dark coloured sawdust. Either that or I have become more impatient. Fortunately I have found a solution to my problem. I have switched to Assam tea which always seems to come out strong enough and satisfies my craving for tea. I wonder if anyone else has noticed tea becoming weaker? If so may I suggest a switch to assam or kenyan. Yours sincerely Penny T. PS the milk chocolate Hob Nob is the King of Biscuits IMO. Chocolate digestive a close second.
	Nicey replies: I wonder if it's your water? We noticed that our trick of using one tea bag for two mugs which works well enough here for Wifey and I failed when on holiday in Ireland with softer water. This could also explain why the local blends over there were very much stronger. Have you moved house to one with a water softening system, new kettle or something?
Pete McWilliam Bahlsen Orange Choco Leibniz Review	Dear Nicey, I work in an Architects practice and as such we consume a large number of biscuits. As part of the process of producing a building we write a specification which gives detailed information about the materials to be produced. When contemplating making a scale model of a house using biscuits we came accross the problem that we don't know some of these vital pieces of information for biscuits. This information includes thermal conductivity (how well they keep the heat in), permeability (how waterproof they are) and compressive strength (how much does it take to crush, not snap them). Do you know where I could source this information? Kind Regards, Pete McWilliam
	Nicey replies: As luck would have it our book contains a small section on this very topic, where we look into the problems faced by the wicked witch in Hansel and Gretel. Unfortunately not being architects we completely overlooked thermal conductivity, permeability and compressive strength. We did consider what materials could be used to bond the biscuits together and also the impact that flocks of starlings might have on your roof. I think wafers would have a low thermal conductivity and Ginger nuts a high compressive strength. There aren't really any water proof biscuits so I think you would need to go for something chocolate covered that you could bond together. Choco Liebniz might make a great roofing material, expensive mind but I'm sure you can justify the cost. Let us know how you get on.
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