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Your e-Mails

Helen Lo Mint Viscount Review	Hello, I’ve just finished reading your book which was extremely informative and brought back many childhood memories which the psychotherapist has yet to manage. There is one omission which I must raise and this is surprising given the attention to detail. You talk about the Mint Viscount but then don’t give any information on what was the difference between it and the YoYo. Also any differences between men’s preferences and women’s preferences? I’m afraid my husband is crying into his mug of Assam, after I read out your disparaging comments about lemon puffs and pink wafers. But then I’ve always thought he was a bit of big girl’s blouse…… Best wishes Helen
	Nicey replies: Helen, Well the primary difference between the Viscount and Yo-yo as I'm sure you know is diameter and depth, with the Yo-yo being wider and thiner. Sadly the Yo-yo was discontinued by United Biscuits in 2003, which is why I omitted them. WIth the exception of the Abbey Crunch I wanted the biscuits all to be currently available. As for differences in male and female preferences there are not really any strong trends apart from a much higher tolerance of Chocolate by the females, and hence their enhanced ability to enjoy Sainsbury's Taste the Difference Triple Chocolate cookies. Men compensate with the ability to put up with smashed up, past it's sell by date, and generally iffy biscuits if nothing else is to be had.
Colin Paterson	Hi, I've only just discovered the site, having been bought your book for Christmas and felt I had to relay an experience I had some years ago. My family has long gone without sugar in tea but one of my friends Steve never has. He never had sugar at our house however and the reason is simple ... He was scared! My father comes from the north of Scotland and his accent is said by some to be strong and may be perceived as aggressive. On his first visit to the house my Dad was making tea and enquired if Steve would like one. Steve replied that he would and that he would like one sugar please, nothing unusual so far! My father was in mischievous mood however and replied that "we don't give sugar to students!" (Steve had recently started at university). This comment was delivered with no change in facial expression and nothing to indicate that he was Joking. It was at least 5 years before Steve got sugar in his tea at our house, he never did dare ask again, my Dad still smiles when I remind him. Steve had his revenge however when his mother gave me sprouts! Colin.
	Nicey replies: Your message contains many simple truths within it. Not least that a Scottish accent is intimidating to many. A friend I used to work with (Wendy (aka 'The Scottish Unit') ) who was originally from Glasgow could slip effortlessly from a estuary accent to a Glaswegian one, often mid sentence. She always reserved her Scottish accent for serious business calls. What a lovely Scots themed mail with New Year approaching.
Tracy HobNob Review	Hi Nicey and Wifey, My hubby bought me your book for Christmas as I’m such a biscuit monster.  Anyway I was rather freaked out by your comments on chocolate hobnobs and attracting the opposite sex.  Our relationship began with nights of passion followed by a nice cuppa and chocolate hobnobs.  We always had a thing about them!  Thought I’d let you know so you know you are right!  We now have two gorgeous little boys thanks to hobnobs! Best wishes, Tracy PS I’m missing homeblest chocolate digestives.  The ones in the big long blue roll.  My local Asda used to sell them but they have now disappeared.  Has anyone seen them about?
	Nicey replies: That's very nice to hear. Chocolate HobNobs are the most romantic biscuits. Those Digestives are made by Burton's, I've seen them in Iceland as well as Asda.
Gill Tweed Iced Gems Review	I was in the depths of despair today, missing my son and his wife and my tiny grandson, who live in TimTam land in Sydney. I was wondering how I could make it through Christmas without them. I was in tears of abject misery. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. It was the postman with  a parcel from Amazon containing your book and a message from my family with love and the wish,'may your tin be always full!'. Well, because I have been trying to lose weight, so I will be able better to fit into the airplane seat the next time I fly to Oz, my biscuit tin has languished empty for many months. But buoyant with the joy this present brought and cheered by the loving wishes from my family, I rushed off to Sainsbury's and splashed out on virtually every biscuit variety available, including pink wafers, to which I am unaccountably addicted (chacun a son gout and de gustibus non disputandum, as they say!). I just wanted you to know that I feel a hundred times better than I did before the postman's knock. And I think the book is pure genius. Thank you so much. Best wishes. Gill Tweed. PS I once had to perform the Heimlich manouevre on an adult at a school Christmas party in order to dislodge a stubborn iced gem from her windpipe. Truth is stranger than fiction. GT.
	Nicey replies: Gill, So glad that we have cheered you up with our ramblings. Hope you get to do some biscuit research with your family down in Oz soon.
Brian Barratt	Esteemed Mr Nicey: Yesterday I had a nice cup of coffee at a small place called The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf ®. First of all, though, I had to explain to the nice young lady what "black coffee" is. It was served in a not-nice styrofoam sort of cup thingy, on which was printed a message about how one could recycle the cardboard thingy which surrounded the cup thingy, to protect one's hands from the heat. And a lot of information about how they brought the finest coffee and tea to the USA (a foreign country on the other side of the Pacific Ocean) in 1963. I'm not interested in how they brought the finest tea and coffee to the USA in 1963, and I'd rather drink my coffee (and tea) from a proper cup and saucer or mug. You know, the ceramic containers we use in civilized countries. Nicely printed leaflets told me about buying coffee and tea in pounds, and ounces, and measuring it in fluid ounces, too. Alongside that, we have another nice American chain offering "footlong" and six inch long food. In this country, we haven't used pounds, ounces, fluid ounces, feet or inches since last century. It seems that they also rush their fresh roasted coffee to their stores in a fleet of trucks. As the "store" I visited is in Australia, I wonder what sort of trucks can navigate the Pacific Ocean on a daily basis? Perhaps these people think Australia is a colony of the USA? Do you have the same problem in Britain? I remain, dear Sir, ever your 'umble Brian Barratt
	Nicey replies: A Merry Christmas to you Mr Barratt, Yes we too are treated to much the same sort of level of localisation. I think its terrific that the Americans still use feet and inches and pounds and pints etc. Imagine just how far the western world could have advanced if American scientists were allowed to work out their sums using nice sensible metric units which all behave themselves well in sums. Instead they are trying to work out how to send spaceships to Mars using a system of units based on the distance between Henry I's nose and his thumb. You have to admire them for that as it makes all their sums much more difficult and fiendishly complex. Perhaps the French could lend them their reference meter, a platinum/iridium bar exactly 1 meter long, and the Americans could try it out for a few days and see if they liked it. Actually maybe it's best if we got it off the French first and then lent it to the Americans. We could tell them that whilst it wasn't strictly ours we are allowed to have it at weekends, on account of inventing the word 'weekend'. Of course the French have borrowed that word off of us for years with out so much as a thank you. Still c'est la vie. Apparently when the metric unit of length was described as the number of wavelengths of light from a coherent source the American's were delighted as now they could properly measure how long an inch really was. To be fair the Americans resolved to adopting the metric system in 1972 at some point in the future when they get round to it. When visiting San Francisco a few years ago I thought it was odd how people were going out to buy coffee and then wandering around the streets with it in paper cups. What sort of place was it where people seemed unable to make coffee in their own home, and having bought it why wander around instead of drinking it? Compare this to France where in a farmhouse in deepest Perigord I was treated to black coffee made using a saucepan and a filter pot by a lovely old French lady Mdm Mouliner, and slices of homemade Walnut Gâteaux. The walnuts were from her own tree and the eggs from her chickens. A single small cup of the coffee provided about three days worth of caffeine. I maybe trying to make a point here, but given the late hour I'm not sure what it is.
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