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Pink WafersBiscuit tin
Nicey replies: Alexandra,

Having been educated to degree level at the same august if slightly concrete obsessed establishment as yourself I have first hand experience of subsisting on a student diet. One quickly learns to adapt to ones impoverished circumstances and try new foods as well as completely revising ones whole understanding of best before dates. I well remember some friends taking their lives in their hands as they cleaned out a catering size jar of mayonnaise which had been left in a house that they had rented. By the time they became desperate enough to do this they had already lived there for the best part of a year. The same house also proved very stimulating to its largely biology student residents due to its impressive use of assorted wall paper roll ends. These were all from the 1970s school of large orange flowers on a black background wallpaper design. The large poster they had of the H Bomb detonating at Bikini Atoll often struggled to outdo the wall paper for dramatic and imposing presence. More academic stimulation could be found behind one of the wardrobes which had its own ecosystem of slugs which were living on the tender shoots of a shrub which was managing to grow through the wall.

So I can only say with respect to your biscuits that you were fortunate to find them to your liking. I would say that the plastic bag would have helped to create a constant micro-climate in which your biscuits could exchange moisture with each other and what ever atmospheric moisture diffused in. This would allow them to go stale much more gradually which is after all why you bunged them in there in the first place.

Biscuit tin
Nicey replies: Angela,

Thank you for that, its always good to hear about people willing to push at the boundaries of biscuit technology. Do you use a fresh piece of tape each time, and do you use one of those tape gun things if you do?

Actually I could see this approach becoming quite addictive, and going around taping up things around the house after one has used them. The cereal boxes, tubs of margarine, doors, pets etc.

Slightly concerned that your husband doesn't eat many biscuits.

Mike Percival
Biscuit tinDunkingRest In Peace

Lincoln Review
Nicey replies: Hello again Mike,

Yes its quite common to find 4-5 month BBE dates on biscuits when one actually has cause to take notice. It is in the nature of NCOTAASD's mission to have to sample biscuits which are very close to or have actually passed their BBE date. The simple truth is the fresher they are the better, and particularly for shortcake biscuits like the Lincoln which seem to hold up the least well compared such things as Garibaldis and Gingernuts.

I think you are probably doing about all you can possibly do. Excluding moisture, light and extremes of heat are about the best one could hope for. Maybe a protective atmosphere of pure nitrogen gas (as in crisp packets) if you have any compressed nitrogen and hermetically sealing vessels with valves to hand. Even with all of this the biscuits will still go off caused by inevitable and irreversible chemical changes. Indeed one of the arguments that kept biscuit manufacturers using hydrogenated fats for so long was that they prolonged the shelf life of the product.

These modern twilight Lincolns will have none of that. Devoid of hydrogenated fat, the last of a great and majestic dynasty of patterned shortcake biscuits. Like the giant Sauropods at the end of the Cretaceous Period 65 Million years ago, going about their business on the shelves of Sainsbury's unaware that they are about to be wiped out by the dispassionate comet of de-listing.

Perhaps they'll continue to find a place in that great seasonal biscuit assortment the Family Circle selection tin, (only its a plastic box nowadays) along side the Gypsy Cream

David Blaxill
Rocket ScienceBiscuit tin

Nicky Bramley
Biscuit tin
Nicey replies: Hi Nicky,

Yes I particularly enjoyed that bit too I'm glad you picked up on it. Well done on your other points too. I think we could develop this into the definitive list in time for Christmas, which would be very helpful for all those clueless uncouth people. It would also be a boon for all those sticklers for decorum who could brow beat the biscuit tin abusing louts with it (I was once interviewed in the Daily Mail you know).