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||Dearest and most esteemed Nicey,|
Having recently returned from a year under the tyranny of the Lu controlled french biscuit market, i hastened to click upon your tricoleur icon and read all manner of french related biscuitaries. I would like to point out that, while we may pity our gallic cousins for their ignorance of the ginger nut and other such delights, they are positively a fully developed nation compared to the Italians. One fellow Erasmus student we met, from Rome - a cosmopolitan centre of cultural exchange you may think - didn't even know what a kettle was. And when we poured the steaming water from stylish yet practical mouth, he simply refused to believe that the water could have been boiled in such a short space of time. What kind of nation doesnt even know what kettles are? The french might heat their water in the microwave, before adding a teabag and a splodge of UHT milk in attempt to make us feel at home, but at least they'd recognize a kettle were it placed before their eyes. Needless to say, the italian later returned to Italy bearing gifts of kettles for all his relations, along with copious amounts of Tetley's breakfast tea. A poor introduction to english tea perhaps, but when it's either that or lipton yellow, the sacrifice must be made. Incidentally, he will shortly be coming over to visit us, and we are desperately keen to get him onto higher strength cuppas such as PG, and maybe even a Yorkshire 'hard water' brew. I'm already planning the accompanying biscuit menus in my head. He only has three days to sample to full wealth and diversity of the UK biscuit - any suggestions?
|Nicey replies: It's difficult to know where to begin but obviously you'll need to give him some Garibaldis. |