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Tim Tam vs Penguin Review
I agree with Margaret Morrell, in that the more Tim Tams per packet, the better! However, I think she fails to acknowledge the fun that can come about in constructing creative ways to decide who gets the 11th Tim Tam. Growing up in Australia, I have friends in the outback who have swum through creeks at night naked in order to earn the last Tim Tam. Where would the challenge be if all Tim Tams were equally divisible?
Tim Tam vs Penguin Review
I am wondering whether you have any idea of the cruelty you regularly inflict on lovers of the best biscuits in the world - Tim Tams?
This cruelty lies in the fact that in every packet there is a prime number of biscuits - 11 - divisible only by itself.
This means that unless one is a lone biscuit eater ( and I don't think even I could eat a whole packet ) you, Arnotts ensure either a total fall-out amongst a group gathered together to partake of said Tim Tams, or at least one disgruntled person ( cries of "unfair" are heard ). It is, after all, a well known fact that a packet of Tim Tams must be consumed at one sitting.
I beg you to rectify this sorry situation by putting 12 biscuits in your packets in future. In this way, when 2, 3, 4 or 6 are gathered together, peace will reign supreme.
|Nicey replies: No don't mind me you just have a go at Arnotts.|
||Good morning Mr Nicey!|
Here in Australia, we attach used tea-bags to the wide brims of our hats, as shown in your little Aussie logo. If they're dry, they dangle around and keep flies away. If they're still wet, they also act as personal air conditioning filters. If they're Twinings, we suck them for the residual flavour still in them.
Ever you 'umble
||Nicey (Mr), this Amazon announcement is probably years old, but it concerns all of us. The book in question is Milk: The Deadly Poison I picked this up from the IgNobel Prize site.|
|Nicey replies: Just because you like your tea black Barratt (Mr) there is no need to stir up trouble.
The milk guy is a bit over zealous. Everything we eat has bacteria in it, bit unfair to lay that one on milk. Luckily we evolved on the same planet as bacteria so we have the means of coping with that.
As for growth hormones, well lets leave that to the Americans shall we.
Antibiotics and pesticides, well again unfair to single out just milk again on that one, and of course there is now Organic milk freely available.
Fat and cholesterol. Yes, its part of our diet, up to the individual to eat sensibly.
He didn't mention that you could drown in the milk if you held your head under for long enough, or that being hit by a tanker load of the stuff would be dangerous.
Once I heard about the Tim-Tam Slam I instantly saw the potential of this phenomenom to add itself to our biscuit munching habits here in the UK. I endeavored to discover the suitability and technique for several of our British wrapped biscuits.
Report 1: The Penguin
This was an obvious first choice because of its similarity to the Tim-Tam. I bit the biscuit at either end to allow for tea passage. As the biscuit gets melty if held, I recommend this is done without hands, simply holding the biscuit carefully in your mouth and dipping the end into the tea. I sucked until the chocolate on the outside began to melt slightly, then withdrew the biscuit from the tea and, using slight incline of the head, flicked the biscuit into my mouth.
Result: The Penguin may be a denser biscuit than the Tim Tam, but it is still eminently suitable for Slamming. The technique is tricky and could get messy for beginners, so using a finger to usher the biscuit in and using a shorter length of biscuit are both acceptable and often recommended. Caution must be advised to avoid risk of choking.
Report 2: The Rocky Bar
Next I tried the Rocky Bar, a sweet light golden biscuit topped with a small layer of caramel and coated with a strange chocolate that tastes milky and not as smooth as Cadbury's chocolate. I tried exactly the same technique as with the Penguin.
Result: An excellent success. Although the chocolate seems cheaper there is more of it. The biscuit is lighter and absorbs tea very well,and the caramel adds a soft chewy egde that was most agreeable. The same cautions as for the Penguin must be applied.
Report 3: The Kit-Kat
Here I was taking a risk. Would wafer be suitable for tea-sucking purposes? Would the thin fingers remain stable, or would it be a cardboard soggy mess? I bit the ends off the single finger of Kit-Kat, and was drawn between whether to bite the finger in half for two shorter slams or whether I should do it in one. In the end I tried both, and proceeded with the Penguin Method.
Result: Fairly good, considering that I am not a wafer fan. The Kit-Kat remained stable but the full length test required me to use hands and bite it twice to get it all in my mouth, definitely a messy endeavor. I would recommend the two-halves method, which gave a smaller, hotter Slam but one that can be done hands free without risk of too much mess.
The preliminary tests have gone very well, and suggest that these British wrapped biscuits are indeed suitable for Slamming. More tests must be done on a wider range of our biscuits forthwith! Well done to the Australians for pioneering the technique.